5 things I’m doing differently in 2020… That are not New Year’s resolutions
5 things I’m doing in 2020 to be just a bit better:
It’s the new year. Hoorah for insurmountable resolutions that fail and make us feel just a bit worse than before. Like, I’m going to work out every single day of 2020… Ya, ok, good luck with that.
While I’m a stubborn, goal-oriented person I don’t always suggest that jumping on the resolution bandwagon is the key to improving your new year. In fact, sometimes I think the hype each new year gets interferes with our ability to make small, but meaningful changes.
It’s not always about the biggest change. Sometimes the small ones bring more joy and clarity to your everyday life.
So here are 5 things I plan to do in 2020 that I might actually be able to keep up with and might just improve my life 1%. Which, in the scheme of things is actually pretty major.
Also, if working out is part of your 2020 goals, check out this post for 10 tips to create a consistent workout.
1. Screen time limits.
Ok, besides the “I hate my phone” people out there, I can safely say a lot of us suffer from screen addiction. It creeps up on you.
15 minutes on Instagram, is actually 60 minutes in real life. It’s like this magical time warp where time moves slowly and you don’t actually realize how much time you’ve “wasted”.
Now, I’m the first person to say I like social media and I don’t think there is anything wrong with being an active contributing member of it.
However, limits are key. And lucky for you, your iPhone has a nifty little screen time limit system to keep you in check.
I put myself at 15 minutes for Instagram (unless it’s work-related). Your phone even warns you when you get down to 5 minutes left (and boy does it go by fast).
Now, you can opt-out of the limit by agreeing to “one minute more” or “notify me in 15 more minutes”. Which, I’m not saying I haven’t done before.
But having a strict limit that is looming, makes me keep my scrolling in check. This is about focus and attention. We want 2020 to be a year where we gain traction on our personal and work goals. Not a year we spend envying people’s highlight reels, or mindlessly checking memes.
Might I suggest this phone case for a good reminder of this: ( ** we may earn a commission from you clinking the links in this post at no additional cost to you, for the full affiliate policy, click here. )
2. One household task improved upon
Ok, you guys should know- I have a lot of clothes. Like a lot, a lot. I don’t want to go into numbers but it’s safe to say my closet(s) are packed! Now, there is nothing wrong with this. I find my passion and energy through my fashion choices and I love following trends. It has become part of my identity in a lot of ways.
However, putting my clothes back- a bit more challenging. In 2019 I did a major closet organization that took about 2 weeks to complete.
So for 2020 my goal is to maintain that by the magical and simple act of putting my clothes away every day.
Every girl knows that a chair in your bedroom is basically a dumping ground for every outfit that didn’t make the cut. And it becomes a black hole of clothes in less than a week.
It sounds simple, but making sure I don’t end up with a black hole of clothes- is my 2020 goal.
It’s a simple act that I can be vigilant of and it will help improve my quality of life. Is it going to cure cancer or bring world peace? Absolutely not.
Will it make my living environment a bit cleaner, and help me find the clothes I want to wear when I need them. Yup. And these are the types of things I need in 2020. Small but impactful.
So, find the thing that irks you in your household and try to do something about it. Think small. Don’t say I’m going to deep clean my kitchen every day. Please, just don’t try to do that.
3. Make an effort to be there for my friends.
Making friends as an adult is downright hard. If you’re lucky enough to have special people who have followed you through your lows and highs, I can’t stress this enough- KEEP THEM! Take an extra 30 seconds out of your day to text them. Send them a photo or a meme, or just a funny voice message. Make plans to see them in 2020. Possibly even a standing date.
Your friends are part of you. They have shifted, tweaked, and helped you form your identity in every way (good and bad). But the oh-so-special part is when it gets bad, they will still be there for you. And, that should never be taken for granted.
My friends can make me laugh until my stomach literally hurts- and they accept me for all my rotten choices.
The best way to pay that forward- give them the same love in return. Now, how do you do that? The next point is a great example.
4. Considering what others need from me, instead of trying to give them what I think they need/want.
I have this bad habit of wanting to help but sometimes giving people what I think they want instead of what they actually need. People are usually more straight forward than we give them credit for.
We think its a mystery that our friend or family members are upset with us, but in fact they explicitly (at one point) told us exactly what they want and need.
Sometimes its a simple as being better at communication. Does your friend always text and you always forget to respond? Well, a response is a pretty easy thing to give them- start there.
My friends sometimes tell me, in the kindest of ways, that I can be blunt/harsh. I don’t realize it, I think I’m being anything but that… However, my opinion on that topic is inconsequential. This is about me hearing them and trying to adjust how I deliver information. Listening, that’s the goal.
It’s not about batting 1000. (look at me with these baseball analogies, going strong in 2020). It’s about making a conscious effort to hear what people NEED from you and trying to give them that.
Instead of telling them what you think would be best. Listen, and adjust.
5. Remembering I am not Wonder Woman.
It’s disappointing I know. I wish I was Wonder Woman- she’s badass, she can do it all, and she looks amazing while doing it. But, the reality is- I am a lowly human who gets tired, frustrated, and sometimes says the wrong thing. I push myself too hard, get frustrated by my lack of perfection, and exhausted by my inability to be “all the things”.
But, reminding myself that this is not only realistic but actually completely normal is a huge step. I can’t do all the things, and I can’t do them all perfectly. So instead of getting so dead set on these unachievable goals, I want to do things well and put my heart into them. I want to stop focusing on the things that I hate and focus on the things that bring me joy.
It sounds like a huge feat but in reality its a bunch of small decisions that lead up to this.
I’ve focused on better planning my day, limiting my screen time, and for difficult tasks putting a timer on them. This means basically if it is something I hate doing, but it has to be done, I give myself an acceptable amount of time to finish it, set a timer, and then stop whenever it goes off. It prevents me from sinking into a black hole over something that might not be working right now, but I’m also not giving up.
The new year is exciting, it’s the time we all feel we get to wipe the slate clean and try again. From a mindset perspective that is huge. So in order to make the most of this year, I am abandoning the whole life overhaul we have become so accustomed to for the new year and opting for things that the people in my life deserve… Like trying to be a slightly better person than I have been in the past.
“Happiness is not having what you want. It is wanting what you have.” ―
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And pin this for reference, let’s try to improve 2020 together.